Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Beach Boys

HAPPY DECEMBER to all! Let the ABC Family and Lifetime and Hallmark Channel Christmas specials begin! Aaah... I do SO wish I could be there fighting back the coupon-loving mobs of JCPenney this holiday season. Christmas just won't be the same this year without forty-hour work weeks selling Levi pats to middle-aged men whilst juggling finals and big fat essays at the same time. How will I go o?! Hmm. Somehow, I think I'll manage. Anyway, I hope you all had a GREAT Thanksgiving and a bodacious Black Friday! Do me a favor... give your local retail worker a big hug this Christmas season, eh? Their Christmas is probably not going to be as merry as yours. ;) I hope you all had a nice little Thanksgiving breaking, even though you missed me terribly.

So, onto the week that was! This year I did not find myself in a tin hut in Guatemala for Thanksgiving like Dad predicted. My ward mission leader and his wife (who is about fifty times cooler than him) invited us over for dinner! A Thanksgiving miracle! They're around the same age as me, so it was pretty much like hanging out with friends back home. They didn't know it was our Thanksgiving, but they DID serve us mashed potatoes made with mayonnaise, so I had a little Thanksgiving joy! Last Sunday as we were waiting for our investigator to get out of his baptismal interview, I spent half an hour manipulating my ward mission leader to sign my dinner calendar. And it WORKED! My manipulation skills have been getting better and better throughout my mission. Those poor little RMs are going to be buying me frozen yogurt and Cafe Rio left and right! I cannot WAIT!

This week we also went to our hipster tea salon with our boy Pierre. I got a brew called Rouge Twilight. Delish! Fortunately I didn't leave the car running for two hours this time around, but it was snowing like CRAY! I almost died like ten times this week. Quebec got its first big sow storm this winter, and let me tell ya... Utah roads are a DREAM! A DREAM! Don't complain about them ever again! I'm thinking about asking my mission president for permission to ice skate to all of my appointments from now on. Walking and driving anywhere has suddenly become a near death experience every time I leave the house. PRAY for me this winter!

Other than hazardous weather conditions, this week was just biazarro and crazy. The highlight would have had to have been when we went to my favorite Haitian member's house and helped her set up an LDSSingles account. I've secretly always wanted to make one, but obviously that was a WAY embarrassing confession that I just made, so it was fun to experience LDSSingles bi proxy. Pray that she finds an eternal hunkasaurus! That would be LOVELY!

We had some pretty great adventures in all of this crazy weather as well. The other day we were out knocking doors in -17 weather around 8:30. We were on a cheery street with duplexes covered in Christmas lights, but they had anything BUT the Christmas spirit. We knocked on one of the doors ad o one answered. Just as we were about to move on to the next one, we heard footsteps crunching through the snow. This drunk Quebecois man (totally NOT a hunkasaurus) swaggered toward us. He says, "Ehhhh... vous êtes belles, les filles..." and I was just like, "Uh, thanks, but we're here to share a message about the gospel." SURPRISE! He wasn't interested. DOUBLE surprise! ...We suddenly realized that he was walking around in a SPEEDO! Bhaaaah! In -17 degree weather! My oh my. I prayed that my eyelids would freeze shut! I just don't understand some people... We continued knocking but then another drunk guy started eyeing us, so we went to our car as swiftly as possible and home to thaw. It was just a crazy, crazy week, I'm afraid.

Funny elder moment of the week. We have this joke with the elders because one day in our correlation meeting my ward mission leader touched my arm. It was just the most awkward moment of my life, and both of us wished we could have burned our limbs off. Lol. Anyway, the other day we were in a meeting with the elders and Elder Flitton kept accidentally playing footsies with me. "Accidentally..." We all know the elders are in love with me. So finally after the fifth time I just looked right at him and said, "Elder Flitton, footsies is over." Jokingly he reached out to PRETEND to touch my arm like my ward mission leader did, even though he was still Book of Mormon distance apart. His trainer (one of the most obedient missionaries I've ever beheld) in the middle of his spiritual thought that he was sharing with all of his, looks over and practically dives out of his chair. I have never seen someones eyes go so wide in my life! Ha ha ha he seriously practically dove in front of his companion as if protecting him from a bullet. ELDERS! The best. The very best. One day they'll all thank me for flirting with them on their missions. And their wives will too. They just don't realize it yet.

Anyway, that was the week that was! I hope you all had a Happy Thanksgiving! I really did miss you all terribly. I hope everyone is doing well and that the prospect of finals week doesn't become too much of a drag on your Christmas spirit. I love you and miss you all SOOOOOOO very, very much. Peace and blessings! Joyeux Noël! Big Santa smooch and a jolly old bear hug!

Love,

Soeur Perfect

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